Park life...or Park Lane Life

A lot of my thoughts have really boiled down to one major question:
"What do I want to do with my life?"

And in all honesty I have tried three approaches to this question...

1. I tried to please everyone else....that made me unhappy and frustrated.
2. I tried to aim high....and realized I wasn't tall enough to reach.
3. I tried to go for the pound rather than passion....and I found money cant buy me love.

But unfortunately none of these attempts brought me close to what I REALLY wanted to do. But then I've seen 50 year olds unsure of what they wanted to do, on the brink of retirement from flitting from job to job.

Now I could go around getting other peoples opinions and decisions on what they have done till my ears fall off, but it still boils down to MY ideas and decisions. And I have come up with these ideas:

• The best job would be something that doesn't feel like a "job". Something enjoyable rather than a chore, then the other side of me says, there are always parts of a job you hate, whether it be the hours, a certain annoying person, less pay...but If the main subject area was one of interest surely it wouldn't be that unbearable.
• The areas that I have found to be the ones I enjoy (regardless of skill or qualification) are Film production and reviewing,  creative writing, care giving, cooking, Childcare.
• Then however comes the main point that weakens the resolve; What would I be able to offer a potential employer in terms of work in these areas. And their ideas could be vast...their way of nit-picking the very best for the position from the dregs of the people trying their best to work their way up. Which fair enough in a business point of view saves time, training and money, but for the poor sod willing to put in the hard work and toil learning on the job ( the best way to learn anything in my opinion through practice and practical hands on learning) rather than just appearing with a piece of paper saying you can do the job when you technically...have the knowledge but not the confidence of experience...

They of course want both.

Buggers.

I found a brilliant link that inspired me about aspiring people who do what they love for a living and have never doubted themeslves as everyday they wake up and love what they do...how brilliant! Have a read, it made me think.!

 http://www.linkedin.com/today/post/article/20130704005710-7374576-finding-your-passion-in-work-20-awesome-quotes?trk=tod-home-art-large_0

But, I am still waiting for my eureka moment...along side many others, and I'll continue to pay the bills, and keep myself happy anyway I can, as I hope all of you do.

I had to add this clip of the Vultures for the Jungle Book, as the subject inspired me to write this post..and what better way to explain myself than this way.

True Grit from the Man of Steel

So this is what happened to Henry Cavill, whom some of you will know as Charles Brandon from  TV series "The Tudors" . Now I must admit, it is a roller coaster of a film: It has ups and downs, "stop your whining" times and " Really?!" times, but it is an all-out action film. For any of you who haven't previosly read the DC comics, like myself, it is a good depiction of where Superman came from, why and the what happens next (not to give anything away obviously) but in some points I was left a little confused....from what I had seen of the television series, I was not aware that Lois Lane had any affiliation with Superman until she saw that the poor time keeping of Clark Kent and the spontaneity of Superman didn't add up, but hey-ho, not all films add up with other sources of the same information...plus, it is only a film :)
The tech involved onscreen is well thought out and works well, the main characters link well with the audiences understanding of previous superman viewings (apart from the one I outlined from my personal experience) but it leaves you wanting more...which in my mind cries out as leaving a gap for ...a sequel maybe?!
By all means for an action-packed popcorn muncher watch away!
Thumbs up for the caped-crusader.

Technology: love/hate relationship

We all have one of these revolving door relationships with technology, and don't lie if you say you have never, EVER had any problems with it, or that you "don't do technology". You all have one piece of demon machinery that has decided to go haywire once in a while, a TV, a phone...something with a chip in it, some slight piece of Artificial Intelligence that thinks its got one over you every so often.

Today I nearly nearly killed my printer, over something so simple, but that aggravated me to the point where I was making threats to it that if it were a person would have had me thrown away for many many years.

All I wanted to do was prints something.
This is what this device is for, right? I went to a special shop that sold hundreds of the damn things and I picked this very special one based on its quality and reliability and the little shit nearly causes me (and possibly it too, if it hadn't rethought its actions) a serious melt down.
Everything was switched on, cleaned, calibrated, connected, tested, troubleshooted, and encouraged, and yet, its still refused to do the one thing it was created to do.

Now don't get me wrong, I love tech. its what has separated us between mere humans and modern humanoids, with apps , wireless technology and voice activation  but God help the machine if it doesn't do what its meant to.   

I went through the stages:

1.  I commenced in the normal way to finish the task.
2. I commended the machine in its beauty, quality and magnificence.
3. I repeated step 1.
4. I convinced myself it was something I had done and did everything humanly possible that could have caused a problem manually including setting it up again, changing settings on the computer, fiddling with wires and giving it extra paper.
5. Repeat step 1
6. I ridiculed the machine and hurled insults beginning with its "stupidity" and " ignorance" ending with " its incompetence as a machine".
7. I threatened the machine with death threats, the most favorite being "I WILL throw you out the window, you piece of ****", reiterating how hurt it would be and the destruction I would cause it.
8. I turned the air blue with insults, gave it a final ultimatum, then pulled out its plug.
9. I Plugged it back in and told it would be given one more chance....
10. I then made the air blue again as it printed everything I had asked 10 times, acting out its revenge.

I honestly don't know I would do without my tech. But its the fact I was using it to enable me to do something else easier in my life, and its just made it 20 times in another area.

Me and the printer are friends again now.

Until next time my wireless nemesis.

 

As sweet as Pi

I took part in one of my most favorite past-times/ hobbies today...I took some time out to see the new film Life of Pi...
Now first off I did put off see this as I thought it was just going to be a CGI-fest of high cost effects and bright colors, which technically it was, and since the acclaimed Avatar I wasn't sure of something that in verbal reviews were constantly being compared to it.
The way trailers wet your appetite (which 95% of them do mostly for me) this one did with the beautiful visuals, but I couldn't see where the story was coming from. It looked like a cross between "Castaway" and "The Jungle Book" for all I knew, and I find reading reviews on big films like this can end up being quite biased, so deterred away from it until viewing...
And boy was I impressed. You actually found yourself aligning yourself with the character as he seemed so together, so eager to learn eager for adventure especially the situation about being a follower of 3 religions.
As it all unfolded yes the visuals were breath taking, the plot thickened and the finale...the perfect topping to the cake.
I refuse to give anything away as I will encourage all of those that I know to see it for themselves, but in my eyes it really hit the spot and bettered my expectations.

Move out the way Avatar, Pi and Richard Parker will make waves in the new age CGI department now.

The end of the world...or the beginning of a new one.

Now according to interpretations of the Mayan calender, the world is meant to end today which is freaking a lot of people out. But to me it seems like any other day. Well, slightly different as I've been off sick from work so to my body technically it feels like the end of the world as it knows it lol.

I think this shows more about human fear of the unknown and how far fetched our beliefs can stretch, but I'll run with it for the sake of this post.
Now in theory this thesis of the "end is nigh" all derives from spiritualists in the 80's, convictions stemmed from the christian religion and mis-readings of Mayan text. Now I understand that many many things have changed that may stir this kind of conviction on the earth; Global warming, O-zone gasses, Melting of polar ice caps, all which we can physically see have reformed the earth, but the end in its entirity?....Come on.
They said the world would end on the Millenium for gods sake....its been 12 years since then, does it mean it was just teasing us and postponed it for another 12 years just to fool us?

Religious sects have ideas that the end of the world is for evil to be cleansed from the world, where the bad will be punished and the good can be re-born in a fresh start so to speak. Now we wont get on to my ideas of religion as that will become an argument in itself,  but I can see why they may come up with these ideas... because they can see what people are doing to each other  and what we are doing to our world and our surroundings, the depression and not to mention  the double dip recession. People are crying out for order, for change where people can stop worrying so much and have a happier life.
Unfortunately, by scaring each other further is just going to cause chaos. It will make people more hostile and far more negative.
I think by changing just the small things in life can make the bigger things not so bad.
 For instance little things like manners: Come on you all know how to use them, the obvious ones "please", "thank you", you see someone struggling help them for god sake (no theyre not going to mug you or think you are mugging them) , hold a door open for the person behind you (believe me they will appreciate it) and for gods sake if you see a pregnant lady/elderly person/disabled person who needs a seat on the tube/bus/train get the fuck up. If you want these people to do these things for you, you have to do it yourself. Teach you kids from a young age, and respect what we have and not take things for granted, otherwise if the world does ever end, no one will give a shit when its gone, or when your gone for that matter.

And just for the record...it is now 21/12/2012 at 3.35pm and I am still alive and the world is still here.
Just learn from your mistakes, and don't take things for granted.

You dont know what you've got till its gone.

Getting the creative dam to overflow

After much thought and determination from myself I have decided to get my butt in gear...I'm going to become a creative.
I always was one really, I just repressed it into this feeble body that decided it should just go with the flow if things got difficult.
Ive started doodling again, jotting, which will mean investing in another sketchbook before too long.
Before that I must hold my horses and actually plan what I have to do next:

1. Get some work experience
2.re-design my creative CV... Which I last looked at when I was at uni :s
3. Keep it flowing
4.apply for work experience
5. Be prepared to start at the VERY bottom...again...
But it'll be worth it.

(Deep breath)

Let's do this!

The best thing to spend: Time

People...we humans have this social ideal where we believe that we have to spend money to spend quality time. Not entirely true.

Ofcourse in this modern social world things cost money, even just to go window shopping with my mum the other day I had to pay £3.50 for parking.
I get that, and this isn't one of those rants saying everyone should only do things that are free (not gonna happen) or that entertainment should be free ( the economy would stick its fingers in its ears and ignore us completely) but lately I have found I have been having the best time with little or no money at all.
In the past 4-5 months I've found myself feeling this deep seeded notion that I shouldn't be out there, that I should spend most of my time inside whatever the weather so that I would feel my other half would have company. I then realised through an epiphany that it wasn't that I wanted to stay in it was the fact that I felt by making myself un available would make it seem I didn't want to spend time with him...where this nonsense came from I have no idea.
Now we enjoy going out separately sometimes to what we individually enjoy, we find it exciting reporting back to the other what we have done.
The guilt I then realise spurred from quality time spent rather than frivolous money spend :)

Life is what me make it after all, sometimes that money you refuse to use to save for some car that's gonna take you years to save for...I'm sure spending £xx for you and your better half to see a show/go for dinner/visit those friends you never see cos of money will be time better spent. It will help you unwind and these little activities will make you feel your time has been well spent.